Be Gentle with Yourself

Posted by Katie Kovaleski on April 28, 2020 in life coaching

Felt like the first pic sums up how many people, myself included are feeling right now. Sometimes I find myself wanting to be carried through the day, exhausted and drained and other times have all the energy in the world and desire to help someone else take a load off. And this friends, is what grief feels like. We are collectively grieving on both a macro and micro level; dealing with the state of the world and uncertainty and many of us are also going through our own personal life transitions that necessitate time to grieve. And so some days you are the swimmer and some days you are the rider and both are just fine…

I’ve had quite a few people reach out with sudden peaks in anxiety – I invite you to be very gentle with yourselves. In this grief cycle you will feel things in waves, some days more so than others. When it comes, get into the heart and out of the head, breathe into the feeling without analyzing it or consciously responding to it. Place your hands on your heart breathe expansively into your chest (or wherever you feel most contracted in the body) and say out loud what you are feeling, “I feel _____” and the take 3-4 deep breaths into that feeling until the anxiety starts to dissipate. And then again, “I feel _____” repeat the breathe. If you’re stuck in your conscious mind and can’t connect to a feeling – fill in these blanks: “I’m scared that ______” “I’m worried that ______” these fears and worries leave me feeling _______.

We tend to think ourselves in circles when we are resisting a feeling. Once we admit the feeling, accept and allow it to exist, we can use the breath to work it through and out of our bodies and will feel a sense of calm once again. Now is a good time to reconnect with our bodies. This happens when we begin to REALLY feel vs distracting and numbing. What do you reach for to distract and numb yourself? Are you willing to put it down to reconnect and just be…with you?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *